he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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