I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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