he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
where am i from again
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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