: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
