let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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