I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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