I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
I did not marry a roomba.
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