i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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