Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
