dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
