According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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