Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
