do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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