how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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