My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
