sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Boobs speak an international language.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
