oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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