You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
