i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Randomize
