She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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