forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
