Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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