He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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