I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize
