I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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