Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
