I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
