I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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