just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
