lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
