she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize