Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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