wanna go halves on a baby?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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