You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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