are you still at the devil's house?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize