You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Boobs are out for the taking
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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