HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
