butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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