I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize