kristin has been a bad kristin
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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