You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Randomize
