i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
It's blow job season.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize