I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
