i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
You pole danced in your parka.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
