but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
party gras won. party gras always wins.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize