so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
