Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
i drank out of a bidet.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Randomize
