Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
