Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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