Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize